If, while shopping, you came about some poor woman
your own age who was being helped by a friend, her husband, and a sales
assistant in choosing something to wear, you know how frustrating it can be for
You know what I mean. There’s the lovely lady in her
late 50s, or 60s, or even her 70s, already feeling insecure and wondering how
to dress her no-longer-size-10-body, trying on something ghastly. Huge pattern,
wrong colour, too tight, too short, and just too … (fill in the blank).
It really upsets me when I see this happen, and I
usually have to walk out while the husband (who will usually say, “You look
lovely!”), the assistant (wanting the sale), and the friend (who has her own
agenda) are all doing a great job of talking the women into buying something
that belongs on another body.
Making Our Own Decisions
Why do so many women, no matter our age, feel it
necessary to have someone else help in our decision making – especially when it
comes to clothes? Are we really so unsure of ourselves that we cannot decide if
something we try on actually works for us?
I believe a mirror is the only tool we really need.
And yet, why do we think we need another person to join us in our shopping?
Shopping with Mother
Back in the day, each of us was (hopefully) our
mother’s little princess, and she always happily took us shopping or, as we grew
older, came with us. We often valued her input though perhaps not so much in our
So, the habit of shopping in company obviously starts
Shopping with Girlfriends
Then, having adopted this habit, we often go shopping
with our girlfriends.
Like me, you probably remember going out with a bunch
of giggling girls and coming home with something that was the wrong colour, the
wrong shape, and had totally blown your allowance. And all this because your
best friend thought it was ‘divine’.
I see young girls doing the same thing today. They go
out in gaggles, one of them is invariably carrying a ‘muffin top’, and they
seem to have so much money! Sad to say, they’re still making the mistakes we
made. It’s obviously a cross-generational thing.
Grandmother and Friends
I remember my grandmother used to say, “You might as
well be out of the world as out of fashion.” How true it was.
But I digress …
Friends always have the best of intentions but not
necessarily the same agenda when shopping. While you’re looking for a pair of
pants, they may be looking for shoes, which means you’re in the wrong shop… for
Likewise, your husband may not wish to say the wrong
thing. If, like most women ‘of a certain age’ you have gained a little weight,
especially around the waist, he either doesn’t notice or doesn’t want to
mention it – which is very sweet. Unfortunately, it doesn’t help.
The Major Advantages to
Shopping on Your Own
If your wardrobe suffers after a day of shopping with
friends or family members, then it’s time to consider doing it in your own
The benefits? Well…
You can take a rest when you want and have a coffee in
your time frame. And you don’t have to worry that your companion (girlfriend,
husband, or whoever) is feeling bored or that they have to be home by a certain
And of course, you get to buy the clothes that you
like and look good on you.
I developed a passion for shopping alone a long time ago, and I have one dear friend who is the same. When we go out together we split up and arrange to meet at a particular coffee shop at a specific time. This only works if we’re out with a purpose and don’t want to wander.
I’m spending hard-earned money on my clothes, so I
like to make sure I get what I want.
My advice? When you go shopping, work to your own
agenda rather than that of other people. It’s well worth it!
How do you like to do your shopping? Does shopping
with others work for you? Or do you have a variety of clothing items you will
never wear because they were chosen by somebody else? Please share your thoughts
with our community!